03.30.06

Three’s company part II

Posted in Maddy at 3:47 pm by tina

When your being drop-off at school routine includes:

1) Best friends running to greet you

2) Best friends lining up to give you good morning hugs

3) Best friends jumping around together

4) Best friends giving each other bear hug (Notice the three-some conveniently ignored ‘the other kid’ who was only inch away from them),

5) And Best friends hogging one of the teachers together

The day usually gets better as it goes on. 

The best part about school, is not about things you learn or skills you acquire.  It’s all about the friendships you make and the impact you have on each other.  I can’t “give” Maddy good friends.  They’re simply gifts sent by God, given to protect and bless her life! 

She did it

Posted in Maddy at 10:00 am by tina

I gathered enough courage and told Maddy girl that she is going to sleep in her underwear last night.  She was a bit surprised but happily abided.

I did a ‘walk through’ with her: showed her that the lights were on in her bathroom so she didn’t have to be afraid when she needs to get up for potty.

As we laid on her bed and I went over (again) how she doesn’t have a pull-up on so she will need to get up, the girl said “mommy, but I can’t wash my hands in my bathroom”

She’s right about that (the girl is still about half inch too short to turn on the faucet even standing on the stool).  We got up; changed our planned path to mommy/daddy bathroom; moved the night light and made sure the toilet light was on.  Then I sent her to bed nervously.

She came in to the bathroom in the middle of the night.  It was 1:30am in the morning.  The girl sat down on the mat next to our shower.  She look like she’s still half dreaming and can fall asleep sitting up.  But gosh, I have to give that child the credits for being so determined even in her sleep.  She did her business; walked back to her bed like a little zombie, and didn’t get up until ’sun is out’.

Just like that; She ended mommy’s “you need a pull-up at night” era. 

03.29.06

When is mommy ready?

Posted in Maddy at 9:29 am by tina

I wanted to ask Maddy’s teachers if there are signs kids give to show that they’re ready for underwear at nights, but I was too chicken to even make an attempt.

I already know the answers they would give me.  In their loving, non-judgemental and encouraging way, they will tell me something that equates to “You let her wear pull-ups behind our backs?  How many times do we have to tell you kids either get it or they don’t”

“But it’s only at night time.   It’s a long time for her to hold throughout the night”  I see myself defending sheepishly.

“No BUT’s.. You should know better.  You’re just too lazy to deal with the wetsheets, etc” I imagine them lecturing me.

And they would be right.  All these times, I have been the one who wasn’t quite ready for practically everything.  If it wasn’t for these teachers, Maddy would still be sucking on her paci, wearing a bib and using sippy cup during meals, and probably still using diapers. 

I went to school and check on her just the other day.  All these 2 1/2 year olds not only eat their meals without much mess, they also clean up the table by themselves: dump the plates and cups in the trash can, wash their hands, and then they go to their bag and get their blanket for nap.  They were all doing it without teachers’ commands.  It’s just such a refreshing reminder of what these little ones are capable of doing.

There are no teachers to watch over Maddy’s night time potty training, and I better snap out of my “immuturity” so that Maddy can move on.

03.27.06

Three company

Posted in Maddy at 1:43 pm by tina

Maddy has been extra excited to go to school since last Monday.   Two of her best buddies are there to hang out with her everyday now.

Daddy said she was extra gleeful this morning.  The three of them gathered for Joe’s “morning reading session”.  It is always a complete opposite reaction whenever “other kids” join in.  We’re still working on our “including everyone” social skills.

03.26.06

On her own

Posted in Maddy, Parenting at 9:33 pm by tina

Maddy has been awefully a big girl lately.  We used to have to get up and help her in the bathroom each morning, and now she’s doing everything herself.  Ever since I joked to her in the middle of the week about “Maddy, why don’t you use your own bathroom in the morning so you don’t bother mommy and daddy”, she actually changed her bathroom routine on her own.:

1)  I hear her door open in the morning

2)  I hear the toilet flushes a couple minutes later

3)  I hear her open her drawer to get her underwear

4)  She runs to our bathroom all dressed and washes her hands at the bathtub (It’s still the only place she can reach the faucet by herself)

The first two days when she did that, I had the urge of getting up right away and check on her in the bathroom.  But something wise in me held me back (that and I am never a early bird).  Maddy will always live up to our expectations (or lack of), and I need to give her the freedom to grow up.  So far, she has done wonderfully beyond our imaginations.

Mommy: Sweetie, what did you do to your pull-up?

Maddy: I threw it away in the trash in my bathroom.

She answered with a matter of fact, “mommy, what else would I do with a old pull-up?” tone.  I couldn’t be more proud of her.

Potty training mommy

Posted in Maddy at 9:16 pm by tina

Maddy’s potty training regression lasted for a week and she is back to her normal self: occassional accidents, and most of the accidents occur in the bathroom when she can’t pull her pants off fast enough.

Her pull-up counts were down to two.  When I went to Target today.  I debated with myself on whether I should get more or just give it a try on underwear all the way.

And I chickened out.  Not only I didn’t get her usual Huggies Pull-ups, I went for the Target brand.  Perhaps I wanted to go for the larger numbers so they would last longer.  Not sure what got into me. 

All I know is: after I opened them, I realized that certain things you really get what you pay for.  They just feel like cheap pull-ups and you can tell the quality of the coverage really isn’t there.  

Maddy complained that her butt itches where the edge of the pull-up is, and I felt a little guilty.  But I think we’ll give them a try anyway.  She’s dry even at night most of the time,  and hopefully mommy will be brave enough to move on to the underwear 24-7 when these pull-ups run out.

03.25.06

Gender differences

Posted in Maddy at 9:47 pm by tina

Before leaving school the other day, Maddy had to go potty.  There were two boys in the bathroom already, and one of them proudly told me “I am a big boy and I’m going potty now.”

“You ARE!!” I replied cheerfully but was thinking to myself “aren’t you going to hold your thing when you go?”  Just when I barely finished my thought, something shocked me.  He started an uncontrollable sprinkler.  His pee pee was going everywhere BUT the basin of the toilet.. on the wall, on the toilet seat, on his shirt, and on the floor. 

“Mrs Mills!!”  I found myself running out like a two-year-old ready to tattletale.  Usually I stop to help like a mature grown-up, but it was too much for me to handle.  “There is peepee everywhere and YOU have to change him.”  She went in and examed the ’situation’.  It was obvious that it wasn’t the first time she’s seen it.  She probably thought that I was crazy.

I thought:  So much easier to have girls and thank goodness I don’t have to deal with that… until tonight when we got Maddy, K, and C together:

The girls were playing nicely together until we had to pack them up in two cars to go to a church event.  Suddenly, there was “No, I don’t want to sit by myself” one complained; “I want to sit with Maddy because she is MY friend.” another declared; “Ok, girls.. we are ALL friends.  It’ll just be a two minute ride and then you can all play together when we get there, ok?”

That went on for a good five minutes without gettting their agreement.  We finally gave in and decided to move the car seats so they can all be in the same van.

Then it was “No, C is sitting in MY car seat” Maddy complained.  “No, I don’t want to sit in the back” C said. “I want to sit in my car seat” Maddy whined more.. blah blah blah… and it went on and on again.

And I had the urge to tell everyone to be quiet instead of still trying to come up with some excuses to distract them and please all girls.  My past memories of hanging out with “girl groups” suddenly started to haunt me: how there is always someone who is overly sensitive; how you can’t ever please everybody; how girls in general like to complain about the most insignificant things and they want you to ‘understand how they feel without giving them solutions’.

Two minutes later, they were again good friends.. holding hands and laughing with each other at church.  That lasted until another “I was playing with K and C came over” ordeal from Maddy. 

Someone mentioned to me a while back that it’s better to have ‘even number of girls’ when they play.  Odd numbers causes issues amongst them.  I made a mental note about that and decided maybe I’ll do some experiments about Maddy’s girl playmate dates.

So we had long talks about “being friendly and including everyone” and the “golden rule” on the way home and before Maddy went to sleep. 

Mommy: Can you try to be nice to everyone next time when we all get together, sweetie?

Maddy: no

Girls!!  I’m exhausted from dealing with all these little emotional trauma… It seems just as bad as having to wipe pee-pee off everywhere.  God help all of us parents.

03.24.06

Social conflicts

Posted in Maddy, Parenting at 10:35 am by tina

I thought most social problems only occur when you become a teenager, but lately I realize that even the two year olds face the same social issues we adults encounter.

Abraham finally got moved up to Maddy’s class, and Maddy (I suspect the other kids too) is learning a whole new set of social skills because of it. 

First it was Cole, Ab, and Maddy learning how to become a “three-some” again.  Ms K said it was really funny watching the two boys compete to get Maddy’s attention.  Thankfully that resolved pretty quickly.  They were buddies in the old class, and it didn’t take long for them three to get back to the swing of their old things.

The tough part now is when “other kids” want to join the “Maddy circle”.  I guess she played with them out of ‘necessity’ when her best friends are not around.   Now that she has two best friends with her, she doesn’t want anyone else to disturb them.  The child gives any intruder her very annoying dirty face.

Unlike daddy who loves all his friends equally, I will be the first to admit that I am very selective and protective about whom I call friends.  Part of me totally understand where Maddy comes from.  If I am hanging out with my close friends, I also couldn’t care less about other people.  I too, prefer just hanging out with my good friends if given the choice.

On the other hand, Maddy also needs to learn that we need to include everyone in the social context.  It’s hard teaching a two-year-old that we should be nice to everybody even though we might not like them or click with them as much as we love our good friends.  Joe said Maddy is so much like me sometimes it freaks him out.  “I’m nice to everyone”  I protested.  “You just hide it well like an adult”.  Very true… sadly, learning and doing what is “right” almost seem to be the beginning of the loss of innocence.  I’m giving Maddy the “we should be nice to everyone and include everyone in our play” talk every morning now, but part of me is so sad to teach her “put up a nice face”.   Perhaps I miss the freedom to freely love and freely dislike myself.

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Posted in Misc at 9:38 am by tina

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03.22.06

My little number girl

Posted in Maddy at 10:53 pm by tina

It’s really neat to see how each kid accelarates in different areas.  Two boys at church nursary knew the alphabets way before they turned two.  One of them knows how to spell 20+ simple words now.  We call them little PhD’s. 

For the life of me, I couldn’t get Maddy to get her alphabets straight.  In fact, I think I messed her up already. If I asked her “Which one is T?”, she really doesn’t know.  If asked her “Which one is T for Teddy Bear?”, she picks out the “T” when she pleases.  Most times she just ignores my question.

But she likes her numbers and mazes.  I figured we’ll try out this connect the dot book since she likes her tracing book so much.  And the girl totally fell in love with this new book she calls the ‘ducky activity book’.  She wants to do it day and night, and I started to limit her and use the book as a reward (and then I asked myself what is wrong with me… it’s not like my child asks for a piece of candy or wants to watch TV.  She’s asking to do her WORK BOOK)

And she’s actually pretty good at it.  We do need to sit with her and give her little hints about the numbers sometimes, but she can do the whole thing with very little help from us, specially for the first one.  By the time she does the second one (although she insists), she usually loses her focus in the middle of the page.

Mommy also found this cute memory game that she loves as well.  We’re still working on the rule part (if she knows where the second bear is, she’ll get it right away even though it might not be her turn any more), but we’re tickled by her good memory.

It’s such a delight watching her transform into a preschooler these days!!

Asheville bug

Posted in Maddy at 10:17 pm by tina

Monday night, Maddy woke up in the middle of the night with a fever.  We stayed home on Tuesday and she had a temp all day long (but was promptly drugged to keep her temp in control).

Wed morning, she woke up at 6:00am complaining being hungry.  We had a early breakfast of scrambled egg, corn and peas, some applesauce, and one string cheese.  Half hour later, she vomitted everything.  After that.. her temp went away.

Since she didn’t have a cold or flu, and her temp went away after her puking ordeal, Dr. mommy diagnosed her as having a stomach bug.  I decided to take her in for a check up in the afternoon anyway.  After all, it is ‘different’ from her normal cold/flu cycle.

The ‘real’ doctor said she has ear infection on one side.  Although we’re still a bit skeptical (since it doesn’t explain why her temp went away after puking), but I suppose there is no harm putting her on the antibiotics.  Plus the doctor look into her ears, he probably saw sometihng fishy there.  I was more glad that he cleaned Maddy’s ears and dig out huge ear waxes from both sides. 

I guess she caught her first ear infection in Asheville this past weekend, but I’m glad to see her bounce back in no time though. 

03.20.06

First camping trip

Posted in Maddy at 1:12 pm by tina

For daddy’s birthday, we decided to take a road trip to Asheville and visit the famous Biltmore Estate.  I found this little cabin lodge on the web, and we decided to stay there instead of a regular hotel. 

The place is just about the total opposite of what you would find in Biltmore Estate.  It’s old; very tiny with low ceiling; but it’s just about the best ‘camp ground’ you can find.  We pretended like we’re in Pooh’s 100 acre forest, and Maddy was amused by this really old fashion swing set.  It worked out perfectly for us.  We were able to bring Brownie with us and just let her out whenever since we were in the woods, and Maddy got her own room with a ‘forest’ view that she’s convinced that it’s the same house as Mr Owel’s house in her Pooh movie.

Biltmore Estate was amazing.  The house itself occupied 4 acre land and we got tired after looking at all the rooms in the bottom two floors.  We thought it was funny how we had to drive a mile from the front gate to the ticket house, then another 5 miles to drive to a parking lot, and then walked another 5 minutes to go to the main house.  The whole ‘commute’ from the house to its front gate is longer than our current commute to work.  It is pretty romantic with the winery, walled garden, and its 8000 arce backyard, but Maddy was not all that interested and she declared “I don’t want to come back to the big house”.

We did have fun in Asheville mall and just hanging out at our little shack.  Well, it helps that it has free high speed internet access.  On the way back, we made a last minute ’suprise’ stop at Ashboro Zoo for Maddy, since she has always been such a perfect traveller.  Our favorite thing is watching three baby monkeys play their hearts out for what seems like forever… all the way until the daddy monkey (who sat there the whole time) all the sudden stood up and the whole monkey family followed after him.  Daddy kept saying that’s the way ‘it should be’ and how the monkey daddy ‘had it made’.  Then he tried to leave too… Only to be brought back to reality because Maddy totally ignored him.

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